Srini Chandrasekharan

Category: Assorted

  • Google+ versus Facebook

    Google+ is out. In limited trials. So is it a facebook killer?  If you are not familiar with limited trials in the tech world, think of it as letting a select few people watch a movie premiere, so you can change the ending (if that’s possible) and also drum up publicity in advance of releasing to hoi polloi.

    Since we move  around in the mysterious cognoscenti circles of the tech world (ahem), we received an invite  to check out the new social network from Google. Here are some first impressions.

    The worlds don’t collide on Google+

    Your family, friends, neighbors, the guy you met yesterday, the gal you have never met ever and your pet are all treated as equals on Facebook.  Let’s face it. Each of us has different worlds that we’ve created. From the world of family to relatives through acquaintances to people we simply transact with. Having them all in one network has never made sense. (But, that never stopped Facebook from acquiring 750million users, of which 200M+ login every day!) The worlds don’t collide in Google+. It lets you create umpteen number of “Circles” and create different worlds in which you can drop family, friends, acquaintances and relative strangers of various hues. This means that you can share certain things with only family and none others, and so on. This is how the real world networks work. This is definitely a plus.

    Score: +1 point

    Google+ is a one stop shop

    It combines Facebook, Twitter, Email, Groups and a sophisticated private Chat room with video called “Hangout” in one place. None of this is radically new. With Google+, you can do it all in one place, and enjoy the convenience of having all your contacts in one place. In the tech world, they call this a ‘one stop shop’. Now, let’s think about it. Do we really want a one stop shop for fun things like social networking? Do you really like to eat at the same restaurant every time you go out? And, would you want to order Alu Paratha and Paneer Butter Masala from a guy named Madurai Murugan?

    Score: -1 point

    Google+ vs Facebook: Post office versus Disneyland

    Google’s user interface has always been simple and minimal. Which makes it perfect for transactions like email and search. Not for fun activities like checking out your nephew’s first birthday pictures and idle gossip twittering among friends. The difference between Google+ and Facebook/Twitter experiences is the one between going to a post office and an outing in Disneyland.

    Score: -1 point

    Verdict

    Final Score: -1 out of 3.  Time will tell if the world really needs another social network, that too from Google. In the battle between convenience and coolness, the latter often wins. Especially when teenagers and 20-somethings are involved.  This is a winner takes all game. There is no room for a number 2 in social networks. Zuckerberg can rest easy because he may have already won the game. If anyone has cause for mild worry, it’s probably Twitter at the moment.

    If you are on Google+ or have been reading about it, do write and let us know what you think in the comments section.

  • We have a new home!

    Laughing Gas is now What Ho! at http://whatho.in. We are in the middle of unpacking the boxes, applying for gas and phone connections, figuring out where to put the TV and hanging pictures on the wall. Welcome to our new home!  Do stay and look around, and let us know what you think. Thanks for visiting!

     

  • The Happiest Country in the World

    And, the survey says … the happiest nation in the world is China with a perfect score of 100/100.

    According to a Happiness Survey commissioned by Kim Yong Il himself, North Korea comes in at a modest number two with 98 points. The top five list of happiest nations in the world is rounded out by Cuba, Iran and Venezuela. Generally happy countries like Denmark and Sweden were plunged instantly into deep gloom after being told that they were in “the hundreds” ranking wise. All of Scotland was electrified at their rank of 45, but the excitement quickly died after being told “only because Kim Yong loves haggis”.

    Turns out that rabid dictatorship and being on George Bush’s axis of evil are key ingredients of happiness. Who’d have thunk that?No news on where India finished. We can however confirm that Israel was not even on the list. “The American Empire” not surprisingly finished dead last. Our sources in Pyongyang tell us that the US scored an impressive 3 on 100, prompting a surprised Kim Yong Il to go, “I apologize and swear that it will never happen again”. Our sources also tell us that little known innovative metrics such as “how many days can you go without food” and “how long can you hold your breath in a gas chamber” were used in the analysis and final rankings, along with a brand new numerical system that has now been invented by the North Koreans. It also helped that African countries were not included in the survey, giving China and North Korea clear shots at the top dog positions.

    Unconfirmed reports have Pakistan coming in at number 6, prompting the interior minister Mr. Rehman Malik to attribute the non-inclusion of the commonly accepted “how many times has a bomb gone off under your feet” metric to their poor finish. In Teheran, a belligerent and apparently disoriented Ahmedinejad denounced the Americans for trying to “manipulate the rankings to further their satanic agenda in support of the Zionist regime” prompting the White House spokesperson to respond “someday they will suffer for this when they get democracy.”

    One cannot but admire the sheer chutzpah of the pint sized dictator. We did a little Googling to dig up some dirt on this guy. Apparently he has a fetish about titles, having given himself hundreds of these. An example is “Highest Incarnation of the Revolutionary Comradely Love”. It also turns out that his official bio mentions that he has been “falsely accused many times of corruption, misbehaving with women and murdering his opponents”.  If this guy lived in India, I am guessing that his title is likely to be “Member of Parliament.”

  • Pint Sized Mug Shots

    Oh.. the little joys of living in India! How do I describe thee? 🙂 The topic de jour is passport sized photos. Is it me or is there an insane demand for passport sized photos in this country? In all my time of living in the US (a lengthy tenure), I must have taken perhaps a couple of sets. And they were only required when I applied for, well, my passport. In India, passport sized photos have very little to do with passports.

    The clamor started the day I landed in Chennai almost a decade back. Checking account. Cell phone connection. Gas connection. Phone connection. Electricity. Home loans. Demat account. Auto drivers. Well, on the last part, I exaggerate. But, you get the point. Everybody and his brother in law wanted a piece of the action. At first, I naively did runs of  6 or 8 prints. Pretty soon, wisdom dawned and I upped the ante to packs of 20 to feed the insatiable appetite.

    An aggravating aspect of this matter is that it is impossible to optimize production levels to exactly match demand. Complex algorithms and spreadsheet macros have failed miserably. Which means that you usually end up carrying inventory. Say you do a run of 20 prints. The way things play out, you end up giving 15 of these babies away. A small and odd number get left behind as unused stock. A few months later, you are applying for a permit to park where you work. The conversation with the security chap inevitably turns towards passport sized photos. You go home, rummage through your possessions and come up with nada. Another run of 20 prints is quickly ordered, and soon yet another small and odd quantity is misplaced. And the cycle goes on. It is quite likely that I have hundreds of these pint sized mug shots lying around, mysteriously hidden somewhere in the house.

    An amusing aspect has to do with taking of the photos themselves. The rookies (of which I used to be one) tend to shower, shave and wear collared shirts from this misguided belief that these photos are actually looked at. As time goes by, wisdom dawns. Once, a guy who came to pick up a credit card application casually pocketed my photos with nary a glance. And, to add insult to injury, his pocket bulged with photos of other clients. Seeing my 2x2s being subject to step motherly treatment, I enquired as to how he planned to match the photos with the forms later. “Don’t worry, Sir” was the response. Veterans of this game have been known to enter photo studios and  exit in 30 seconds flat with photos in hand. Shave and shower are most definitely dispensed with. The maestros of this game, I suspect, are dispensing even with clothing of any kind.

    Last but not the least, one has to touch on the quantities, not an insignificant line item which can dent the household budget. Statistical analysis suggests that the number demanded roughly correlates to the importance of the mission. Bank account app usually calls for two. Demat accounts could be more. Interestingly enough, a lot depends on the agent. Some are meek. You can push them to the edge and get away with it. “I have only two, they dont match and were taken when I turned six”. Others are defiant cowboys. “Sir, I need five or six”. “What the..? Why six?”. After intense nego, you can get some of these Quick Gun Murugans down to 3 or 4. Suspect they are compulsive-obsessive collectors. I can imagine the bragging in the back office “I got 12 out of a poor sod today”. I would also not rule out spot fixing and match fixing possibilities. Perhaps vast sums of money are being wagered on who can collect the most on a given day.

    I’ve often dreamt of landing the Bharat Ratna. The highest honor in the land. To do the nation proud. I walk upto the President. And she says “Congratulations on being the first Indian Nobel prize winner in Physics. You have done the nation proud. That new fangled theory of yours that makes Einstein look like a  four year old totally rocks!” I nod and bow graciously, and stretch out the hand, eager to grasp the award. And that’s when she says “Not so fast, buster. I’ll need to see 25 passport sized photos first”. I usually wake up in a cold sweat.

  • I’m lovin’ it!

    I’m lovin’ it!

    Live from McDonalds, in HSR Layout in Bangalore. Folks, the super-sizing of India is well under way. It’s about 1 pm, as we enter the newly opened (well, 3 months back)McDonalds, walking past a mute and vaguely disturbing figurine of Ronald McDonald at the door.

    Once inside, we are greeted instantly by a bedlam of loud conversations, juvenile shrieks and employees taking orders. Adding to the decibel levels is a raucous Sunidhi Chauhan bhangra beat over the speakers. Amazingly, the place is chock full. McDonalds – a lunch destination choice? You could have knocked me down with a McAloo tikki. What’s next? Wedding receptions at McDonalds?

    It’s my daughter’s birthday treat for a few of her classmates. As they find themselves a separate table, avoiding parental proximity, I wander over to the other side. The place is a veritable zoo. As people fall over each other to order Maharajah McChickens and paneer salsa wraps, it occurs to me that the super-sizing of the Indian version of homo sapiens is well under way. Families, bachelors, school girls and grand parents – they are all here, helping themselves to happy meals and large cokes.

    India is chugging at 10% GDP growth and also getting fries with that. Are you lovin’ it yet?